YOU CAN BE A RELAXED BRIDE - FOUR TIPS TO HELP YOU GET THERE

Every bride wants to spend her wedding day enjoying her new husband and loving on all the people who came to be with her on her special day. You’ve put a lot of work into all the details in the weeks and months before the big day, now it is time to have some fun!

We’ve all heard horror stories of the “Bridezilla” gals who spew anger and resentment on what is supposed to be the best day of their life. No one wants to be a Bridezilla, she is not a happy camper. And most often, Bridezilla arises out stress, not because she is naturally a mean and nasty person. So, it is so important to reduce wedding day stress to prevent the appearance of Bridezilla.

It takes a purposeful approach to be relaxed and confident on your big day. Here are a four stress reducing tips for your wedding day:

A small wedding party keeps it simple and reduces stress! Flowers by Katalin Green for a beautiful fall wedding at The Chateau Event Center

RELAXING TIP ONE:

Surround yourself with people you enjoy! And use good boundaries for those who cause you stress. Sigh, I know, not so easy, huh?

Well actually, not so hard either. First, don’t include the sandpaper on the brain cousin (or friend, distant relative, or soon to be relative) in your wedding party. There is not some rule that you have to have anyone in particular as a bride’s maid. You can give those people you love, but can only be around in small doses another role that is honoring but not in your face all day.

Yes, you love them, and yes you want them to be a part. But no, it doesn’t have to be stressful. Reading a poem, greeting your guest and encouraging them to sign the guest book, or any number of other things are tasks that are important and need to be trusted to someone who cares about you. If you want to be relaxed on wedding day those who stress you out need to stay a safe distance, so send them somewhere where they can contribute.

Second, choose vendors you actually enjoy interacting with. And take the time to get to know them a little bit as you prepare for the big day. Most of the vendors I run into are happy to get to know you and to serve you well. They want nothing more than for your wedding day to be a beautiful success. But, if one of them rubs you the wrong way, please don’t hire them. Find someone else to do the job.

To find out if your vendors are the kind of people you want to be around, take the time to spend some time talking with them as you make your plans. Really, they will be more than happy to hear all about your wedding plans, so the conversation will be easy and helpful to both sides. And, it is a pretty big hint that a vendor is not right for you if they won’t take the time to get to know you before you hire them.

Remember, a big part of your time on your wedding day will involve interacting with vendors - the photographer will spend more time with you than almost anyone else; the planner will be checking in with you constantly and helping you to stay on schedule; and the caterers will be a big part of your meals, providing a staff to make sure the food is just perfect. It is vital that you are happy to have these people around you and your guests.

Rowan and Larch adding her floral details to a wedding sweetheart table set beautifully designed and set by Hilltop wedding planners.

RELAXING TIP TWO:

DELEGATE! DELEGATE! DELEGATE! Seriously, you should delegate tasks for the day of your wedding. The only things on your plate should be getting ready, walking down the isle, and partying. Well, and also doing some photos of course, but those should be pre-planned and delegated to the photographer to coordinate.

Let someone else greet the caterer. Have your parents take care of handing checks or tips to vendors who still need to be paid. Let your maid of honor be the one to field questions from people who want to know if you are doing this or that. Bring together a crew of capable people to make sure the reception area is decorated well. Or better yet, hire a wedding coordinator or day-of coordinator to do that for you - they’re professionals and know how to get the job done!

Beauty and the Belief applying bridal makeup for the big event! Having a professional to help you makes the whole process of preparing yourself so much easier!

RELAXING TIP THREE:

Leave as few things as possible to be done on the day of your wedding. There are very few things that have to be left for the wedding day and that actually require you to be hands on on your special day. For example, designing the tablescapes (if you don’t have a wedding planner doing that for you) can be done before hand. You do a practice of this a few days before, and once you have the table just as you want it, take a photo of it on your phone, and text that photo with a few basic instructions to the crew of people you have to do the task. Might I even suggest a group of aunts and your mom’s friends to do this task. They will be excited to be included, they will have a visiual of what it is to look like, and they will have fun together while doing it! It could also be some of those friends who aren’t in your wedding party because they would stress you out (re-read tip one above for a refresher on who these people might be).

A Wedding Planner relieves you of the stress of making sure your table scape is exactly what you planned. This table by Bijou Weddings by Design uses plates from Mountain Arts Pottery and glassware and other items from Tailored and Tied and Montana Party Rentals. Bozeman’s wedding vendors will meet your needs!

RELAXING TIP FOUR:

Have a Wedding Day Schedule: I provide all of my brides with a worksheet to make a wedding day schedule related to photography. This simple document can be expanded to include every part of the wedding day. It gives a time and order for all events. It lets you know how long you have for various activities. It can be distributed to all the relevant people so they know when they are expected to be somewhere, and frankly, when they cannot interrupt you (like when you are doing a first look, when you are doing your sunset photosession, when you have set aside a few moments for just the two of you). And believe me, knowing what comes next and knowing how much time you have before the next event of the day allows you to stay on track for getting all of your desires met.

A few minutes alone on your wedding day is an amazing way to de-stress and connect! Venue: The Copper K Barn; Hair and Makeup: Beauty and the Belief; Florals: Rosewood Atelier Florals.

BONUS TIP: When you make your schedule, put in a few minutes of just you and your love! You will not regret it. A walk out of sight of your guests, a glass of champagne together in a quiet room of your venue, or a chance to visit with a nearby horse in a field can give you the two of you a relaxing break that is exactly what you need to rejuvenate you for the rest of your wedding celebration.

So many Bozeman Wedding Venues are near fields and mountains, some even populated with horses. Roys Barn and Lodge is one of those venues! these offer great opportunities for the two of you to “get away” for just a few minutes and focus on just the two of you.

You can be a relaxed bride on your wedding day, especially when you plan specifically for that goal.